Use Your Pain to Help Others This Christmas

The Christmas season can be one of the most painful periods of the year for many people. Sure, it’s full of joy and celebration, but it’s also full of heartache.

It can be tough, even for pastors. If you lost someone this year, that empty space at the table will look much bigger during this season. Or painful Christmas experiences from your past may still linger and weigh you down.

Add that to all the busyness of the Christmas season in our churches, and you’re not alone if you find ministry particularly tough this time of year.

But never forget—God never wastes a hurt. God will often turn your deepest struggles, even during the Christmas season, into profound opportunities to serve and help others who are struggling.

But you’ll have to be open and honest about that pain—and that’s tough.

Paul regularly turned pain in his life into ministry opportunities. He once wrote, “[God] comforts us when we are in trouble, so that we can share that same comfort with others in trouble” (2 Corinthians 1:4 CEV).

God has a purpose for our pain. It trains us for ministry in a way seminary or Bible college simply can’t.

You have congregants hurting right now. Some people you shepherd have lost a spouse or a child this year. This Christmas they’ll have a person missing from the holiday table. It’ll be the toughest Christmas of their life. And they may never open up about this experience to anyone. Others are facing their first Christmas sober. It’s taking every bit of strength they have to avoid their drug of choice.

Pastor, God can use your struggles to bring them hope—whether that’s through your preaching, sitting with someone at the hospital, or sharing a cup of coffee.

But you must be open and honest, even when it’s scary. 

Your authenticity encourages the people you lead to be open and honest about their own struggles.

Here are some ways you can let God use your pain to help others this Christmas.

• Share how God got your attention through pain.
  
  Pain is often a wakeup call. C.S. Lewis once said, “God whispers to us in our pleasure, but he shouts to us in our pain.” Pain is God’s megaphone. 
  
  The parable of the prodigal son shows us this. Everything was going great in the prodigal son’s life until suddenly they weren’t. The Bible says when pain came, the prodigal son “came to his senses” (Luke 15:17 CEV).
  
  I’m guessing you’ve had times in your past when you came to your senses after experiencing pain. When you share those experiences, you help people’s eyes to be opened to what God is trying to say to them.
  
• Share what God taught you with the pain.
  
  Pain is one of the best teachers. God uses it to help us grow up in our faith. Our pain teaches us to depend upon God, to trust his Word, and to see how much we need others.
  
  In Psalm 119, David describes how God used pain to help him trust and obey God’s Word. He writes, “I used to wander off until you disciplined me; but now I closely follow your word” (Psalm 119:67 NLT). You have people in your church who need to hear that story from your life. They need to know what God taught you in those dark days— because they need to apply those lessons to their own lives.
  
• Share how God brought good out of your pain.
  
  God brings good out of pain all the time, but you rarely can see it while you’re in the middle of the pain. But once you realize it, this new perspective will change everything.
  
  As much as anyone who ever lived, Paul realized that not every situation he faced had a happy ending on this side of eternity. He knew pain and loneliness in his ministry (2 Corinthians 11:24-28), but he also knew God used his suffering for good. People came to faith in Jesus because of his time in prison (Philippians 1:12). In Romans 8:28, he writes from experience, “God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them” (NLT).
  
  Again, you usually can’t see this while you’re in the middle of the painful season, but you can from the other side.
  
  Be ready to talk about how God has brought good out of your pain. If you experienced that Christmas season when you were out of money, describe to those you’re shepherding what it was like when God met your needs. Show them what you learned about God during those lonely seasons of your life. They need to hear how God showed up in your pain. 

• Share how Jesus gave you hope in the middle of your pain.
  
  When people are in pain, they need hope to cope. Whether that pain is in their family, their finances, their work, or somewhere else, they need to know they won’t be alone.
  
  God never promises us a life free of pain. But he does promise to always be there for us. We never have to go through pain by ourselves.
  
  That’s the hope of the gospel. More people will be open to hearing the hope of the gospel during this season than at any other time of the year.
  
  When you meet people in pain this Christmas, help them see how the baby in the manger became the crucified Lord who gives us hope in our pain. 

We’ve all been through painful seasons in our lives. Don’t waste that pain. Let it help others this Christmas season.